Mitra Samal
I ingest a pill that’s banned,
it’s the last one I have.
I am too old to pluck the
rose petals and make a choice,
Too late to decide the future
by flipping a coin.
Reason falters these days,
and logic is corroded with
tumultuous emotions.
I am living, but this existence
isn’t very ladylike, they say.
I fear getting hurt and avoid
intimacy with my guarded heart.
It ends before it starts, and I
lament about it in the verses.
The pill makes me numb,
like a lifeless piece of log
in the woods teeming with life.
A blurry vision comes to me
with indecipherable shapes,
to avoid suffering is an interim
escape without being rational.
The pill may have adverse effects,
but will at least make me forget
the anguish of my mind.
That should suffice, I assure myself
as it is the last one remaining.
Tomorrow, I will learn to live.
Mitra Samal is a Poet, Writer and IT Consultant with a passion for both Literature and Technology. Her works have been published in The Hooghly Review, Muse India, Borderless Journal, Madras Courier, The Chakkar, and Kitaab among others. She is also an avid reader and a Toastmaster who loves to speak her heart out.
losing our grip on purpose 